The countless times I've opened up this webpage to try to blog out my feelings, hoping it'll all feel spiffy afterwards. But I can't. I open this shit, stare at the white space, try to hit those keys, all that's coming out are trash. Fucking emo shit. Hello? I am not emo. I don't want to be one. Why oh why are you playing with these feelings? I feel like a piano, you hit the keys which you deem fit. Leaving behind only a note which lingers. I have no idea how you feel, but the vibes feel strong. Usually, my thinking is never wrong. Somehow, I feel different and weird this time. It's like, hellogoodbye & hellogoodbye all over again.
Note to you: it's good to see you, I missed you last night.
8:21 PM
Hehehe. So on Wednesday, the 7 of us went for the Macbeth play at the DBS Arts Centre near Clarke Quay. I think it was interesting, although they had some teeny weeny mistakes with the props and stuff. Met Yasmine first and we both headed down to Far East to supposedly get Zakiah's dress cuz she had Bio aft school. In the end, we met up with her at Far East. Me and Yasmine had a huge urge to get new heels cuz ours sucked. But to no avail. The MaryJanes I've been eyeing on has gone OOS! Damn sad. Hopefully they still have at the Heeren branch or smth. If not, I'm so gonna get another pair. New heels and dress for Dim Sum Dollies on the 14th July! Yay. Afterwards, we met up with Luci at the NEL line and took a cab from Clarke Quay Mrt. Yasmine lost her phone in the taxi in our excitement. Poor girl. Myn, LC & Nad were late! (as usual) Walked all the way to Clarke Quay itself after that. We all were so effin' tired and hungry but we ended up at 7/11 eating instants. Heh, so here are the peekchures! :]
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5:57 PM
one and three, you're here
(one and three, you're here to tell me we can't do this)
to tell me we can't do this
(three for three, i'll disagree)
anymore
your hair and face against the mirror
as i take the steps to save what's left of me
someone's out when it's over
people steal from you
and they take anything they choose
it's good to see you
i missed you last night
that's such a lovely color
it goes with your eyes
before we fall asleep
i just wanted to say
this all seems so easy
but there's choices to make
can't decide, then look at the faces
candlelight
we're burning the pages
but ask us why
and hurting ourselves with this false start
resign yourself
and always be (and we pretend)
without the one (as if it gets easier)
thing you need (but does it get easier?)
reading words with no replies
when we have these mornings where we can say goodbye
i won't
answer dancing under starlight glow
no one in the city knows
confidence can take you
nerves try to shake you
from going all the way it's not that far
we watch the tide roll in
with cold air and coffee cakes
holding our words at lips
stopping the sounds they make
we know the way to go
we know each step to take
to be here these words with no replies
stopping we's and starting i's
this need is killing me
and taking me over i wanted to mean everything to you
but this isn't right
you keep coming back disassembled
and i keep losing this fight
10:52 PM
I swear, Chinese is driving me nuts. I didn't go to school today. Cuz I wanted to spend my day finishing up all my leftover Chinese homework which has piled up due to lazy days and outing days. Haha. So yes, I've kinda reached my goal. I finished all of school's Chinese assignments & like, 3/4 of my Chinese tuition assignments! Hooraa.
K, byeee. Tmr's the Macbeth play! Yay. But then, another day wasted. But then! Another day of fun! Yessaaaa. I hope we all have fun. I hope that, __________. Yada, yada, yada..
K, byeee. Tmr's the Macbeth play! Yay. But then, another day wasted. But then! Another day of fun! Yessaaaa. I hope we all have fun. I hope that, __________. Yada, yada, yada..
6:25 PM
Another crappy weekend has gone by just like that. It was practically wasted away. So Saturday was kinda boorring. Had the Macbeth course @ around 1pm at RELC, which is next to Shangri-La Hotel, which is near Orchard. Luci was my alarm clock. She woke me up at an ungodly hour of 9am. Couldn't remember what I blabbered to her. But yea, all I knew was I had to reach her house by 12.30pm cuz her dad was sending us to the place. At 11am she called me yet again to drag me out of bed cuz she wanted to spend quality time with me at her house & well, play with Daisy. Haha. despite of my whole body aching like some crazy shit, I dragged myself into my bathroom and had a nice warm shower. Got ready and reached her house at around 12.30pm. Heh, so much for quality time eh?
Waited for that Yilei to reach and off we went to RELC. We were one of the firsts to reach among our school people. Even Ms Hoori was late! Haha. I think the talk kinda sucked. After that, took a bus down to Far East. Everyone else followed cuz I said it took us to Orchard MRT. So yea, they were all kinda ready to blame me if it didn't. Lol. Me, Yas, Luci, Zak ate at BK at Far East. No idea where the rest went. But the 4D&4E people also ate at BK. Kajie, Ervin & donno who else were practically upskirting those people passing by! Haha. But whatever la. It's kinda fun upskirting people. Haha. After that, Luci left and I went with Zak & Yas for a walk around Far East. Went home after that. Then Chinese tuition from 6pm-9pm. I know, I'm damn good right. Haha.
Today, woke up at 11am for mass with Adam. We went to Parkway after that for lunch & bbt. Lol. Bused down to Adam's place to watch '300'. Met Luci and went for the Charles & Keith Warehouse Sale near my place. And now, I'm home. So effin' tired. What a wasted weekend. Okay, fine. Maybe not so. Heh. Bye! :D
Waited for that Yilei to reach and off we went to RELC. We were one of the firsts to reach among our school people. Even Ms Hoori was late! Haha. I think the talk kinda sucked. After that, took a bus down to Far East. Everyone else followed cuz I said it took us to Orchard MRT. So yea, they were all kinda ready to blame me if it didn't. Lol. Me, Yas, Luci, Zak ate at BK at Far East. No idea where the rest went. But the 4D&4E people also ate at BK. Kajie, Ervin & donno who else were practically upskirting those people passing by! Haha. But whatever la. It's kinda fun upskirting people. Haha. After that, Luci left and I went with Zak & Yas for a walk around Far East. Went home after that. Then Chinese tuition from 6pm-9pm. I know, I'm damn good right. Haha.
Today, woke up at 11am for mass with Adam. We went to Parkway after that for lunch & bbt. Lol. Bused down to Adam's place to watch '300'. Met Luci and went for the Charles & Keith Warehouse Sale near my place. And now, I'm home. So effin' tired. What a wasted weekend. Okay, fine. Maybe not so. Heh. Bye! :D
8:13 PM
- Aly holds Jill's hand.
- Aly shows it off to Luci.
- Luci goes, 'Ehhhhhh!'
- Luci starts trying to grab Aly's hand.
- Aly resists & bites Luci's hand.
- Luci gets fed up & bites Aly's hand back.
- Aly runs off to Zak who has an icepack.
- Luci copies her & tries to get pity.
I hate Luci. She's one bitch. Because of her, I have another bruise on my hand. Lol. I was just joking. But that was what really happened during P.E lesson today! Grrr. Yes, we didn't have MT drills today. But we had 2 hrs of P.E, I think. I redid my 5 stations for NAPFA & managed to get a Gold! Yessaa. The guy who was recording our scores was nice la. Heh. Yada yada, school was boring.
Headed home straight after school. Changed, and met Luci at Siglap area. Took a bus down to Alfred's house to watch movies! Haha. We (Alfred, Andrew, Jonathan, Eterna, Joshua, Yilei, Luci & myself) managed to watch American Pie 1 & 2. Ordered Canadian 2-for-1 as well. Joshua & Jon went home and we left for Parkway. Shit happened with Yilei, so I went up with the guys for pool first. Went back down to Don's Pie Club to 'collect' Yilei & Luci. I didn't play pool, they did. Well, I ended up playing those touch screen 'Spot the Difference' machines again. Haha! Me & Alfred died within the first round of our first try! Played with Yilei & andrew after that cuz Alfred left to meet Jiahui (I think). I left shortly after, was super tired.
Prrfft, tmr there's the Lit course at RELC! Might be going for the Charles & Keith warehouse sale with Mummy in the morning! Hooraaa, I hope I can find nice shoes/bags. Hehe, bye ya'll! :D
10:21 PM
I know. I'm guilty. Lack of updates once again. I've been too busy with a whole lot of shit. Seriously! Plus the fact that my mum banned me from the computer on weekdays. So yes, I'm isolated.
I can't seem to remember what I've been doing throughout the week. It must be the overdose of Chinese, cuz we had MT drill from Tuesday to Thursday. Yes, it's super like wtf. I don't know how I managed to survive. Haha.
Yesterday, went to Tamp mall after school to buy the Macbeth tix with nad, yas & fatin. I emptied my wallet by paying for those people their tix first. So yes, I had just enough cash leftover for a measly LJS combo 1 meal. Me & Yas ate while Nad & Fatin uh, stared. Went straight home and rushed out again to meet up with Luci, Adam & Sham for the ascension mass. Some shit cropped up so yea, it was left with me, Adam & Sham. Sham left so me and Adam went for dinner at some cacat Indian place. As in, selling pratha and stuff la. Headed to Adam's rooftop after that. It was awesome la. Damn freaking cool. If only my house was like that. I would so totally spend my life there. Met Hiro & Daniel, they were super cuties. Haha. Watched L word on youtube. Then I went home, with an awesome bruise on my knee :D
Whatever, this blog post so totally sucks. I don't understand why I blogged when I didn't have the mood. Ah, fuckit. I don't wanna bother saying my results. Some good some bad. But wtf. Goodbye, uh, readers.
What's wrong. I'm so freaking confused.
I feel like breaking down. It's all going the wrong way.
This wasn't the way it's supposed to be.
Why'd you have to go and mess me up once more?
P.S. I dreamt that 'we' were together. =/ 9:33 PM
Is it that hard?
6:31 PM
Eh, fuck la. All you mother fuckin' chee byes out there who don't even fucking know me: Stop bloody ripping my nice photos okay. Seriously, don't forget that I'm one of your contacts on MSN (although I don't know why the fuck you added me when you don't even talk to me anyway.) so I can see your stupid display pic with the pic you so easily ripped from my blog. Stop being such a stalker la. Knns. There's a nice peekchure, you better not fucking rip.
4:48 PM
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Yay! Me is a happy happy girl. For one, Mid-Years are finally O-V-E-R! Yessaaaa.. Secondly, I absolutely lurrrrve today. And well, yesterday. Hehehehehe. This post shall be filled with pwetty peeekchures of myself and well, other random people. -.-So yesterday was the last day of Mid-Years. But what a way to end it! I got caught early in the morning by our dearest Ms Abraham. I was walking into school, then she was like 'girl girl!'. I was thinking, 'ah, fuck it. once again.' So yes, she made me leave my bag with her & throw away my ear sticks. I don't fucking understand what's wrong with my innocent pathetic black earsticks! I use the ones with like a 'dot' on them. Not the sticks. But like, a stud? Made of the plastic la. Without a backing. Seriously, what's wrong? It's fucking cheap, not like I'm trying to make a statement that I can afford hugeass diamond studs or what right. Mutherfuckin chee bye. It costs only like a dollar fifty for god knows how many sticks. Sheesh. -.-
So yes, I took my Science MCQs in a rather foul mood. Went down to see her after that. Thank god Alvin Lim was there. Really, cuz we had to end up doing CIP. I was like, 'wtf? you said you wanted to call my mum. and you make me do CIP.' So yes, she didn't end up calling my mum. So lame. I know. Waited for Luci to finish her POA paper, then we went to eat at the Prawn Mee shop @ Katong. After that, went over to her house. Hahaha. She had tuition and well, whaddya know? She was already late. So typical of her. I wanted to eat desert so much so we ended up at Xin Wang Hk Cafe Siglap branch. Met up with Henry, the chef from Cine. Said hi, bye, he asked for my number, so yes, I gave la. We had the strawberry ice thingy and a bo lo pao. Chatted about our Hk Cafe times, it was fun, I must say.
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She went for tuition and I went home. Went for my own Chinese tuition at Hougang. Daddy picked me up and headed to airport for Mother's Day dinner at the Soup Restaurant. Eh, you all must try it. It's effin' good. Esp the Ginger Samsui Chicken. Wah Lau, damn steam k. Hahahaha. Too bad I don't have the pics, was too hungry, no time to take peeekchure. Lol. Went home, finally had time to read my books, SLEPT!
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Woke up at 11am this morning. First person I talked to, the Yuka kid. She woke me up la. It felt great to sleep through the whole morning once again. Can't remember when was the last time I was able to do that. Haha. Finally got my butt out of bed at 12.30pm. Was late in meeting her as we wanted to go to Simpang for lunch before our Macbeth course. Bla bla bla, I'll save you the lousy details. Rushed home, changed, went back out! Yaaaay, town trip with Jilleh & Yuka.
We went to the Shop-A-Fair 2007 at Carlton Hotel. Jilleh & Luci did some makeover thingy, I didn't wanna do it as there were alot of chee ko peks around and well, god knows where they get their makeup from. But they looked pretty! Haha. After that, we went to Raffles City's Subway. Met up with Andrew, Eterna & Joshua. Me and Luci shared a foot long double bacon chicken melt. It was like, shiok la. I so love Subway. Joshua left shortly after, well the rest of us slacked at Subway. Then Jilleh left and we four headed upstairs to Coffee Club. We shared a Chocolate Fondue. Peeekchures again. Went home after that, super duper effin' tired. Zzzzz..JPG)
So yes, I took my Science MCQs in a rather foul mood. Went down to see her after that. Thank god Alvin Lim was there. Really, cuz we had to end up doing CIP. I was like, 'wtf? you said you wanted to call my mum. and you make me do CIP.' So yes, she didn't end up calling my mum. So lame. I know. Waited for Luci to finish her POA paper, then we went to eat at the Prawn Mee shop @ Katong. After that, went over to her house. Hahaha. She had tuition and well, whaddya know? She was already late. So typical of her. I wanted to eat desert so much so we ended up at Xin Wang Hk Cafe Siglap branch. Met up with Henry, the chef from Cine. Said hi, bye, he asked for my number, so yes, I gave la. We had the strawberry ice thingy and a bo lo pao. Chatted about our Hk Cafe times, it was fun, I must say.
She went for tuition and I went home. Went for my own Chinese tuition at Hougang. Daddy picked me up and headed to airport for Mother's Day dinner at the Soup Restaurant. Eh, you all must try it. It's effin' good. Esp the Ginger Samsui Chicken. Wah Lau, damn steam k. Hahahaha. Too bad I don't have the pics, was too hungry, no time to take peeekchure. Lol. Went home, finally had time to read my books, SLEPT!
Woke up at 11am this morning. First person I talked to, the Yuka kid. She woke me up la. It felt great to sleep through the whole morning once again. Can't remember when was the last time I was able to do that. Haha. Finally got my butt out of bed at 12.30pm. Was late in meeting her as we wanted to go to Simpang for lunch before our Macbeth course. Bla bla bla, I'll save you the lousy details. Rushed home, changed, went back out! Yaaaay, town trip with Jilleh & Yuka.
We went to the Shop-A-Fair 2007 at Carlton Hotel. Jilleh & Luci did some makeover thingy, I didn't wanna do it as there were alot of chee ko peks around and well, god knows where they get their makeup from. But they looked pretty! Haha. After that, we went to Raffles City's Subway. Met up with Andrew, Eterna & Joshua. Me and Luci shared a foot long double bacon chicken melt. It was like, shiok la. I so love Subway. Joshua left shortly after, well the rest of us slacked at Subway. Then Jilleh left and we four headed upstairs to Coffee Club. We shared a Chocolate Fondue. Peeekchures again. Went home after that, super duper effin' tired. Zzzzz.
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11:51 PM
Baybeats 2007
3rd-5th August 2007
Friday - Sunday
Baybeats is finally here. Omfg, I can't wait. New bands like Caracal, Giants Must Fall, etc. Seems like Indie is really thriving in Sg. Plus all the other frequent ones. Can't wait for more updates!! YAAAAY. This year I'm really gonna go. Not like last year, cuz I didn't know many bands. Haha! Hooray.
6:51 PM
Love is like a War:
Easy to begin, Hard to end.
1:36 PM
OMFG. THIS IS ALL TOO MUCH FOR A SMALL LITTLE GIRL LIKE ME TO TAKE IN A SINGLE DAY. FUCK FUCK FUCK. I SO WANNA GOOOOO.
Pre-sale Tix: $50 (sold out), $60
At the door: $80
6:32 PM
- Tanning @ Sentosa
- Threading @ Little India
- Ann Siang Hill (Chinatown)
- Shopping Spree!
- Food Tour w Luci, Jilleh & Yilei.
- Eyebrow/Lip Piercing?
- Grow long hair! (MUST)
- Accomplish B/W wardrobe.
- Home Club!
- Go Crazy. (RLY)
Okay, that's all I can think of for now. Ohya! I wanna a Nintendo DS. Like now, now, NOW! So yes, Imma' bribe my parents. Hopefully it'll work. Ta-ta folks. I just remembered, so much for my hiatus. Hahahahahahah. K, not funnay. Thanks, bye. -.-
4:38 PM
I fucking hate that bitch of a stranger living in the house. You're no fucking princess. So stop thinking that whatever crap you say goes. Seriously, stop acting all concerned when in actual fact, you're just jealous. I'm sorry, you & I have never been close. Never will I want to anyway. You're so god damned unpleasant. It really makes me so sick thinking that I am actually somehow part of you. I find it hard to imagine that I've lived all of my life with you. I remember those times where you hit me. Be it on the head or a pinch on the hand or leg. I remember how mommy told me to write on the calendar why, when & how. I remeber that precious thoughts calendar. I remember how I used to sit in front of the door and cry my heart out. Then you'll just walk past me, like nothing ever happened. Don't ever come around asking why I'm so cold. Cuz you are the fakest person I've ever seen. I don't even know you. You tell on me. But I cover up your tracks. I'm not deaf, blind nor mute. I hear your conversations, you're so loud. I see stuff I don't want to. I don't know you. I really don't. Since when did you care? You act like you do. I'm sure. But really, I hate it. All those questions, it was all for your own benefit. Since when did you really wanna know. More like so you could use it against me huh? I remember telling you about my r/ships. But you ended up telling on me to mum. I don't remember doing so towards you. I remember you under the study room table, crying and screaming as mum caned you. I remember bringing your dinner to the room thereafter, only to be shouted at and having to clean the food you trashed to the ground. I don't remember anything like a 'thank you' or a 'please'. I only hear the 'me', 'I' and vulgarities you showered on me. The time when I was in primary 3 and we were walking home from school. You shoved me into the drain from behind and just walked away like nothing happened. Just cuz you didn't get your share of the biscuits the maid brought. I'm sorry. But I never had a sister.
11:59 PM
Since I was a child. Whenever I thought about princesses in gowns, I never did think of those with lace or frills or whatsoever. It was always this image. This pattern. This colour. This dress. This is my desired prom dress. Pretty, ain't it? Now, who'll be the prom date..
Forget these wide-eyed fears
3:42 PM
What is with the world today? Why the hell are there so many 'copy-cats'. I mean like, if you can't write, then don't just copy-paste someone else's post into your blog and claim it's yours. Don't you feel embarrassed? What's worse is the close link to that person that you have. Don't be so stupid and naive to think that no one will find out and you'll go on living your 'fake' life as told by you by someone else. Ah, fuckyou&fuckoff.
As always. If you think that this is about you because of 'assumptions'. Don't assume, please. Cuz assumptions make an ass out of you and well, me. So yes, stop thinking that the world's blogging about you. But then again, for that particular bitch out there: Stop copying and start thinking.
Sidetracked. School sucks. I am stressed out. I cried twice today. I failed my EMaths Paper 1 by 2%. I feel like a fucking failure. I hate A Maths. I hate my unreliable tutor. I hate my butt for still sitting on this chair instead of studying. I am going to crash under this stress soon. I feel like an asshole for pretending today. I feel like a bloody, god-knows-what. Ah, whathefuck la ok.
O's is one hella' killer.
As always. If you think that this is about you because of 'assumptions'. Don't assume, please. Cuz assumptions make an ass out of you and well, me. So yes, stop thinking that the world's blogging about you. But then again, for that particular bitch out there: Stop copying and start thinking.
Sidetracked. School sucks. I am stressed out. I cried twice today. I failed my EMaths Paper 1 by 2%. I feel like a fucking failure. I hate A Maths. I hate my unreliable tutor. I hate my butt for still sitting on this chair instead of studying. I am going to crash under this stress soon. I feel like an asshole for pretending today. I feel like a bloody, god-knows-what. Ah, whathefuck la ok.
O's is one hella' killer.
9:48 PM
No more talk of darkness, Forget these wide-eyed fears.
I'm here, nothing can harm you - my words will warm and calm you. Let me be your freedom, let daylight dry - your tears.
I'm here, with you, beside you, to guard you and to guide you.
Say you love me every waking moment, turn my head with talk of summertime.
Say you need me with you, now and always.
Promise me that all you say is true - that's all I ask of you.
Let me be your shelter, let me be your light.
You're safe: No one will find you, your fears are far behind you.
All I want is freedom, a world with no more night,
and you always beside me to hold me and to hide me.
Then say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime.
Let me lead you from your solitude. Say you need me with you here, beside you.
Anywhere you go, let me go too - Christine, that's all I askof you.
Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime.
Say the word and I will follow you.
8:52 PM
Why is it that each time the weather is all nice and windy with a low humidity rate and then I board a double decker bus 2 and take the whole ride all the way home at the back of the upper deck all by myself a smooth, soft & calming song comes blasting through the cacat earphones of my Ipod Mini making me feel all nostalgic & full of regret & each time the weather is hot and irritating with a high humidity rate and then I board a single deck bus 24 and take the whole ride all the way home with a/c smelling like banglas and a stupid r&b/reggae/pop song comes blasting through the cacat earphones of my Ipod Mini like as if the whole atmosphere is not the worst thing ever but having to fumble around in your bag for your effin' Ipod just to find that your Ipod refuses to play the song you want? Fuck it man. I hate it when that happens. Anyways, life has been real hectic. Running around all over Singapore, yes although it is effin' small, is making me sick & phlemgy. And the best timing for all of that to happen is when you're having your Mid-Years. Crap ballz. Like the sickness ain't torturous enough. Thursday nights spent at Chinese tuition in Hougang. Saturday mornings once again at Hougang for Math tuition. And Sundays from 10am-5pm for Math tuition. It's really crazy. And well, driving me crazy too. My body is not taking it well. I feel so tired. That I can't sleep anymore. I know, so ironic huh? Take for example, I spent the whole of yesterday studying. I woke up late for my Math tuition. Supposed to reach there at 10am but I woke up at 10.30am. Cuz, why? I was studying till 3am the previous night for SS. So yea, had tuition until 5.30pm. Then went over to Hougang mall to study more till around 9pm? Took a bus home, had dinner at 10pm, continued studying from 11pm to 2am. It's like, wow. The last time I did this kinda intensive studying wasn't even during PSLE. It was during Primary4 Streaming. Which was what? 4+2=6 years. Wow, that's like almost half of my life. Everyone should go read The Abortionists' Daughter by Elisabeth Hyde. It's an effin' good book. Really interesting storyline about betrayal, trust, belief. Don't worry, no sex scenes. Although I didn't get to finish the last 20 pages, I got to read the ending abit. Kinda unexpected. Go read it. For now, I will be on a hiatus till deem fit for blogging once again. Keep the tags coming in and well, take care and use protection :D P.S turn up those speakers for POTO. It's daaaaa bomb, yo.
3:21 PM
