another major one. this time, i gave up.
i can't take it anymore. i can't.
my head's throbbing, as if my pulse was gonna jump out anytime.
my fingers feel cold and numb.
i feel like im gonna pass out anytime now.
im sorry. for everything.
no, wait. you keep telling me my apologies are useless, cos i don't change.
i keep the same old fuckin' self in there.
like a freakin' dead person.
yea, prolly better of dead.
im so sick of all these petty quarrells.
you put things up for the world to see but i'd rather not.
you just don't know what people say do you?
cos you don't apparently hear them. well, i do.
they say they 'THINK' they know. but they don't.
you may ask why it's affecting me, cos i'm sick of people guessing.
why put your side of the story online.
i don't do publicising cos i don't embarrass people i treasure.
what's the use. pick up the bloody phone and call if you really want to.
why blog? why put it on your nick?
yea, in the end when i ask, i get sarcastic remarks.
to you, they may not be sarcastic.
but i practically smell it. i tell myself, why ask?
keep your bloody trap shut.
maybe that'll bring peace. but it didn't did it?
you said i was too quiet.
keeping stuff to myself, not letting myself be understood.
and now you say i'm building a wall.
hah! a wall. a friggin wall.
i'm quitting. i can't. i don't. but i will if you do.
11:00 PM